Premier Blaine Higgs & Chief medical officer Dr. Jennifer Russell addressed the public at 2:30 pm today to announce the little patch of grass in Grand Bay-Westfield beside the vet’s office is closed.
You know the one. The one that people sometimes sit on and eat their lunch and stare at the water and the sky? The one that the old-school Grand Bayers are adamant is in Grand Bay proper, and that Westfield isn’t even really a place, and should just go quietly die somewhere or something. Anyway, that patch of grass is closed effective immediately due to concerns of social gathering during the global pandemic.

This announcement comes after yesterday’s bombshell announcement that the United States is a complete and utter dumpster fire from the top down, and that phone communications between the neighboring countries will be cut, due to fear that people may still care about one another.

The weed stores will remain open though,
to quote Higgs, “420blazeit”

Self-Isolation – Day 20: Sweatpants.

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