Couple Costume

“You’ve got to HAND it to me, am I right?”

I was dressed as a hand for Halloween.

It would be widely considered
the least creative costume of the past decade.

She wore a paper grocery bag and a tiara
trying to recreate some book from her childhood.

Later, a drunk girl with a face like the bottom of a bucket
asked us if we were doing a couple costume, if we were
“the act of bringing groceries in from the car.”

When people make guesses at my costume,
I always tell them they’re exactly right.

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